Happy Dependence Day
by Mike Godesky“President” George Bush surprised the world today by turning in his homework a full two days early, handing over sovereignty of Iraq earlier this morning. Now the administration has reached its goal from the beginning. A free and democratic Iraq? No, of course not. I meant having the ability to continue doing whatever they want, allowing the country to sink ever further into a whirlpool of chaos and destruction while passing off the blame on the Iraqi government. Yeah. That’s the ticket.
Apparently, national security advisor Condoleezza Rice passed George a note during class to let him know that Iraq is now sovereign. Bush then wrote down on the note the words, “Let freedom reign!” Of course, it should be noted that “freedom” is Bush’s nickname for Halliburton.
And what of Iraqi dictator Saddam Hussein, who the Red Cross said would have to be charged or released from custody by the June 30th transfer? Not to worry. Custody of Hussein has been handed over to the new Iraqi government. Well, sort of. You see, Iraq will get “legal” custody of Saddam Hussein. But the United States will maintain physical custody. Sure, it sounds strange, but it’s actually not that uncommon. Sort of like how “legally” the Bush administration has violated international law, but physically they’re not going anywhere.
But at least Iraqis will be in charge of their own country now, right? Well, not quite. Because the United States is going to maintain its presence with 138,000 troops in Iraq through 2005. In other words, today we can celebrate the birth of a free occupied Iraq.
So what has changed between yesterday and today? Well, we took that guy Paul Bremer, and we replaced him with this other guy named John Negroponte.
